The mid-90s, those were the days of going to get your nails done, making it the highlight of coming to school on Monday, showing off that airbrushed blue and purple design. Some people kept it simple to a few colors, an asian symbol, some colors to match an outfit, or even the french tups for that special occassion. But then we had a few ladies that would walk in with the neon bright, glow in the dark, can't open a can of pop, uber long extensive nails that just cause limitations to daily life activities. If you can't dial on a phone or open up a car door without straining to find a way to complete the task at hand....it's time to give them up!

This was brought to my attention when i was speaking with one of the new hires at my job a few weeks back and she was showing me how one of her nails had bent back and broke off. The blinding neon shade of yellow that was painted on the 9 remaining nails had me in shock! I just wanted to ask her....why do you even have those on?! and why are they so0o long? Can you even type on the keyboard to do your job? I refrained from questioning her and continued to listen to her story about how the nail broke off, which she then went on to say how she started not to come into work that day due to how bad this nail hurt...if nails are keeping you from work, again, it's time to give them up!

So in the words of Beyonce...let me upgrade you! You want to wear your own nails. They can still look cute with your own touch. Do you know how many personal manicure sets that are sold at stores? I recommend walking into one of your local CVS/Walgreens type drug store and find yourself a quick little set with a nail file and nail clip, possibly a nail buffer. From there, in the same store, you can find a variety of nail polish colors to choose from (dark colors for fall/winter, bright colors for spring/summer) and save yourself the time you would spend on Saturday mornings, battling the crowd at the nail salon. Believe me, its not worth it!

Sidebar...you can thank me later for not only making your nails look better but also for all the money you will be saving on that $30 fill in each week, or a whole new set of nails that could be like $40 now, probably more than that! This economy is too messed up to be wasting money on nails when you already have them! --KscaY

I think I threw up in my mouth, just a little. But you've got to see this video. For now this mass of disgustingness is only in Rhode Island and Nebraska (surprisingly not in the good 'ole heartland test market that is Columbus, Ohio!) but as fat as we are, and people emotional eating because of financial situations, it soon will sadly spread to other states (unless the epidmeic of heart disease, hypertension and high cholesterol don't kill off the testers!)


sidebar...I'm embarassed that someone from here in America would even come up with this! YUCK! No offense, but this atrocity seems like it should have hailed from the good fat country of Germany more than here. (I know it seems that we don't like Germans on here, but to be real my father's fam is from there, so don't get ur panties in a wad!)

Oh the fattenings we have become! Excuse me while I go into cardiac arrest. --Brie Z

The spotlight is definitely on Heidi Montag...the video above is of the performance of her first single "Body Language" the the Miss Universe Pageant 2009. The only word that I could think of to describe this performance was TRAIN-WRECK. This is one of the worst performances I have ever seen. I don't know who told her that she can sing and dance. Heidi needs to de-friend them because they told her the biggest lie ever in life. My question is...why didnt anyone stop this during the preliminary stages?? I know someone was watching her practice...they could have seen then that the final product was going to be awful. There should have been an intervention.

Sidebar...Now Heidi...I know you have money and thats fine..but that doesn't mean that you automatically have the ability to sing and dance. It is a gift that you were not granted. Dancing is not something you can learn...you either can dance or you cant. Its not teachable...and hunny you CANT dance. And Im sorry that one of ur friends, or who you thought was ur friend, told you that you could because honestly they are not your friend. They should have kept you from embarrassing yourself.

Sidebar Sidebar...now if this bitch (excuse my german) can have a single and record deal...I should have been had one. I would have danced circles around her. See the problem is that they're not ready for me...my talent is just too great...they'll be ready someday...but thats another story...--azureDizzle

Ok, so I stole this from a friend of mine, but even for a girl, this movie looks amaaaazing! Mos Def the kind of movie that you have to go see on a date night so that you have some one to hold you or someone to hold on the scary parts. Maybe all of that holding will lead to some other things! lol

My biggest issue is that this teaser is out now but I have to wait 'til F-ing January to see the movie!
--Brie Z

I am so loving the new Maxwell song "Bad Habit" and loving the video even more. Even though the song is technically not new to me (since I ran out to get the album the day it was released, @ 10am when the store opened), it still gives me that fav song tingle. I hope that it does the same for you.

Sidebar...I want to warn you that the video has a sexy scale of 100...but don't get any ideas about my boo Maxwell because I will find you.--azureDizzle

Sooo...I really want to cut my hair like Chrisette Micheles. I think it is an ultra cute cut..and I'm just finding the right time to do it. But lately I've noticed that guys dont really like short hair...and I really dont know why.(not that everything I do is to impress guys...but hey it is a factor in my life...Im not getting any younger). But anyway, I used to have super long hair (at least to my standards) in high school and I always wanted to cut it. But everyone I knew was like "no..keep your hair...your hair makes you..blah blah blah". Even now, after I finally cut it off, and grew it back, I proposed cutting my hair to my friends. My girls were just as excited as I am...my guy friends not so much. After viewing this awesome picture above, I asked one of my closer "homeboys" if he was "feeling" it...and he, to my disappointment, shook his head no. I dont think anyone should be defined by their hair...its low key insulting...what am I not as cute with short hair?...do I look more masculine with short hair? what is it? Is my ego not as big? I dont think so.

Sidebar...Ladies and gentlemen not believe the hype about long hair. Its not as fun as everyone seems to think it is, especially during the summer. Who wants something long and hot sitting on ur neck in humid 90 degree weather? It sucks. Guys you should understand too...try wearing a big fro in the summertime...and you'll soon feel me.

So for now I'm still going to wait on my cut. The change will come soon though. And then you'll see that I will be just as fly as ever.--a.k.47

Is it placed in a man's DNA to pick up the phone six months or later and say what's up as if we just talked yesterday? Majority of the time, we ended our so-called relationships for a reason, therefore most forms of communication were cut off. This six month follow up phone call (text message, facebook message, whatever) tends to be unnessary and very pointless. The conversation is mostly an awkward recap of what life has been like since you last spoke. For example, are you still in school? Are you still working at that one place? There might even be a story about how he saw or spoke to your friend and decided to give you a call...And then you wait for him to suggest a meeting of some sort...lunch? drinks? his place? WHY do guys insist on interupting our lives to fill this urge in their head that is telling them to make contact? Believe me, you can skip this check point in life's path, I'll be fine. Seriously, just continue to facebook stalk me like you already have been. That should provide you with some updates as well as save face when you realize that I no longer care if my called ID flashes your name.

Sidebar...If you agree to the meeting and contemplate a reunion, please take the time to think about why you broke up or stopped talking in the first place. If the problem isn't fixed, don't waste your time! Continue to feel single, sexy, and free of drama until a better opportunity presents itself...like Dwayne Wade on bended knee while "So Beautiful" by Musiq plays in the background, he opens the ring box and a single tear rolls down his cheek as he professes his love and desire for you to always be in his life as his wife...but that's just my opinion :) --KscaY

Sidebar...sooo I have a question...When did the tail come back in style??? and yes I am refering to the Eddie Murphy "Coming to America" tail circa 1988... when did that haircut come back in style??? never you say?...thats what I thought. So you can believe my shock and amazement when I saw this guy come into my store with a "the tail". He is clearly stuck in the 80s because the last time I checked it was 2009 and the tail has been out of style for a long, long time. So if you see this guy and or any other guy like him, who believes that the tail is still a cool, bomb (or any other positive adjective) hair cut, please sit him down and smack the shit out of him to kindly bring him back to modern times. Thank you.--azureDizzle

Sidebar....so I think I may be turning into an old white woman because I am madly in love with loafers. I don't know what it is. The more that I am around them @ work, the more I seem to love them. They are a casual shoe that still gives off a hint of sophistication. Even though they come in many brilliant colors, styles, and textures that can spice up almost any casual outfit, I dont know if I have the courage just yet to branch out and wear them outside of work. I tried this past weekend on my awesome trip to cincinnati and found that they weren't as accepted among my friends. Some liked them yet others so calmly, and without hesitation, referred to them as "Michael Jackson shoes" (RIP). Now I dont expect everyone to jump on the bandwagon. But as you can see, many stars have embraced the awesomeness that is the loafer. And I predict that soon enough I will expand my own collection of loafers. If you are skeptical about the loafer...I understand. I was once as skeptical as you...just give it time. The loafer will win you over.--azureDizzle

The life of a customer service rep, all glitz and glamour...I was pretty sure college was going to save me from jobs like this but I guess not. This economy is kicking my ass! I just want to thank Prez Bush for letting me sit at this desk from 8AM-5PM listening to grown people whine and cry about how fees were not their fault, and how I have somehow stolen their money. Look people, if I could tell you how I really feel, I would no longer have this job. Being nice to rude people is not my style nor will it ever be.

Sidebar...has anyone heard of the girl who filed a lawsuit against her college, suing them for her tuition because she can't find a job? I need her phone number because these loan payments could be paid and I could lay my 2 weeks on the table, scream profanities at all customers and walk out with a smile on my face...

Until then, I'll just continue taking calls...and try not to stab myself in the eye...even though I would get to leave work early if I did--KscaY

Ok, so I work out three times a week for an hour session each so its safe to assume that my trainer and I are pretty cool. I mean, as a trainer you get put in odd sitch-iations, holding people certain ways and them showing you body parts you probably don't wish to see. Well, none of that is me. (Thank goodness!)
Any who, I just got off the elliptical machine and was walking down the hall to the weight room. I waved to a few people as I walked which all smiled sweetly and waved back. Upon my entrance to the weight room, my trainer told me to lay face down on the weight bench. Already I feel odd cause he is just standing there behind me as I crawl to lay on the bench. I grab the two weights on either side and begin to lift up and out to work my back muscles. He spotted me for the first two lifts, then sits next to me and with a crazy look on his face tells me that he wants to tell me something when I'm done.
"OK," I say of course but wondering why he doesn't tell me while I'm lifting. So I get off the bench and he tells me to lean down to him and he tells me that I had ripped a hole in my pants and that he could see my panties!
"Well, thanks for telling me now!" I yell, I mean, my booty was all in the air and people walking in and out of the weight room! Now when he was spotting me, he was blocking it. Him moving TOTALLY made the sitch-iation worse! Dammit Joe Schmo trainer!
Then he was like, "At least they were nice,"
I'm just glad I wasn't wearing a thong like I had planned this morning!--Brie Z

Sidebar....so say that ur dating someone & somehow stop dating them (by no fault of your own). However you still have feelings for them somehow... & say that they end up with a girl friend (that you want to kick in the chest everytime you see her). Now say that they finally break up...& the former boo asked you how you feel about the stich (situation); basically about the break up... & being the honest person that you are...you tell them that you're happy, or excited, or jumping for joy (or all of the above).

If you havnt already figured it out..i had this sitch. & being the smart person that you are, you know that I said that I was jumping for joy (in a way that didn't make me look like a coldhearted bitch) Now after looking back, Im asking myself...was it wrong for me to be happy about the demise of the relationship? I don't think so, given the circumstances...but I'm also thinking about what "homeboy" thinks. Is he ok with my jumping for joyness at the demise of his relationship? or does he think that I'm that coldhearted bitch that I was trying not to be. Does me being honest change the way that he feels about me? & yet do i really care?....a little, maybe, kind of....just something to think about.--azureDizzle